Never a peaceful moment

Posted on 28 Jul 2025 @ 9:12pm by 1st Lieutenant Cassandra Matthews & Master Sergeant Thomas Zang

2,722 words; about a 14 minute read

Mission: General Sim Postings
Location: Holodeck 3

Cassandra lay on her back her head resting in Thomas's lap. The thick grass of the forest floor was plush and cool. The sun played peekaboo through the canopy of pines and other various trees. The babbling of a tiny creek nearby soothed her to her very soul. The best part though by far was being able to just gaze up at Thomas's sweet face. It had been so long since they had spent any time together. She'd missed him. Longed for his presence even. She was glad they could finally be together again. The program was of a walking trail in Washington. They had already done three miles of trail before Cassandra needed a break. Her body was still healing, and her endurance was still lacking as a result. That didn't matter though, not in this moment as her blue eyes drank in the sight of him above her.

Thomas leaned against the trunk of a large Ponderosa pine with his legs crossed. Cassandra's head rested perfectly on his lap, his shins against her shoulders. He casually petted her hair as his head rested against the rough bark with his eyes closed. He enjoyed the soft cool breeze that blew across them and brought the clean sweet scent of the creek mixed with the earthy tones of the plant life and fallen leaves and pine needles.

"I love you." Cassandra declared tenderly. Voice nearly as soft as the breeze that carried it from her lips.

Thomas opened his eyes and looked down at the lovely woman in his lap. "I love you too, Cass. More than you know." He kissed his fingertips then pressed them against her lips. About that moment, his hearing caught the rustle of some leaves off to their right and he glanced that way. He had set the program up to simulate the actual Washington forests, minus the dangerous animals. "Shhhh, stay still and watch." He whispered to her as he nodded in the direction of the sound. He pulled a bag of trail mix slowly from a pocket on his jacket and took a handful out. He tossed it over in that direction and froze.

Cassandra shifted enough to look where he'd indicated. Her mind still swimming in the bubble of joy brought on with just the brush of his fingers. The soft rustle of the brush made her involuntarily go tense though. Her body automatically preparing for potential danger. So many thoughts rushed to mind blowing out the peaceful moments like a candles delicate flame. One breath and it was now nothing more than a memory. The fine trembling began in her left hand as it inched towards a weapon that wasn't there. Her first instinct to protect herself overriding common sense that this was a holographic program.

"Stay still and relax, your safe." Thomas whispered as a doe and fawn stepped out of the bushes. They paused half revealed and looked around, their ears rotating as they scanned for any danger. When they found none, the doe took a few hesitant steps out then it leaned down and sniffed the scattered trail mix Thomas had thrown out. It hesitantly licked some up before proceeding to eat more as the fawn stepped over to its mother. The fawn then proceeded to start eating the food as well.

It took a few moments for her mind to fully digest his words, for the innocent sight before her eyes allowed her heartbeat to finally slow down again. Her hand though still trembled slightly, something she couldn't control. Cassandra forced herself to relax again. Soft slow breaths. In through the nose,1..2..3.. hold it, blow out the candle slowly 3..2..1. just deer, it's just deer. Not scary monsters. Her hand reached out and sought his craving that extra comfort. The movement though drew attention to them. With in moments both Doe and fawn had fled. "S..sorry Tommy." She said disappointed in herself.

Thomas laughed. "It's ok Cass. You will have nothing to fear in this program. I left all the dangerous animals out and only put the docile ones in." He said as he took her hand and threw out more of the trail mix as the deer had already eaten most of what he had thrown out earlier. He pulled her up so that she was leaning more into his chest than in his lap and wrapped his arms around her. "If we stay still and quiet, more might show up. There are a few animals in this area that might come by as well." He kissed the top of her head.

Cassandra felt so safe in the cocoon of his embrace. Her body began to relax again. His soft reassurance easing her heart and soul. She didn't want to watch deer she decided. Instead, she shifted in his lap moving so that she could curl her body fully against his, so he was cradling her. Her arms moved around his neck and her face rested against his chest. She didn't need to count her breaths anymore as she focused instead on his. Deep, slow, despite the rapid beating of his heart against her ear. It was beating as fast as her own. So strong and steady. She tried to stay still now and quite so that he could enjoy watching the wildlife as he'd been doing as she simply enjoyed having him here with her. It had been weeks since they had last stolen away together on the holodeck of the Themistocles. Though they had *seen* each other since and had talked together, it wasn't the same as this. As just laying helpless in his arms. Not an MXO, not even a lieutenant, just Cassandra a woman who was deeply in love with Thomas. Soon though, they would be deploying and that meant that there would mean even less time together like this. It was not a pleasant thought. So, she pushed it from her mind choosing instead to linger on just the here and now.

Thomas held her close, his eyes slightly closed as they sat there. He casually petted her hair as she cuddled in his lap, her head against his chest. "I was thinking of taking Martha to the holodeck for some fun, but I wanted to get your permission first. I was thinking of running a fair or carnival program and letting her have some experiences from the late 20th, early 21st century." He said before he kissed the top of her hair. "I figured that it would also give her a chance to get to know me more and for me to get to know her better as well."

Cassandra listened. Not sure at first if she had heard him right. "You want to take Martha out to a carnival?" After she said it herself she felt the smile pulling at her lips. "I think that is a wonderful idea. I think she would really enjoy that." She moved so as she could see his face. "I have to warn you that she's a bit of a handful. You have to watch her really close."

"I think i can handle her if i can handle you." Thomas said with a grin and a wink. "You can be a bit of a handful yourself." He leaned in and kissed her.

Her body responded to that kiss instantly as though his lips possessed a fire that had shot through her body. It was almost painful in its consumption, her body raw with need for him. Cassandra forced herself to behave though. She kissed him back with tender reserve. "Well, if you're sure. Then you have my permission." She replied once she could form words again.

"I want to bring C'tirr a good gift as well. I'm just not sure what would be a good one for him. I'm also attempting to learn Caitian." Thomas said with a smile. He felt her body nearly tremble when he had kissed her.

Cassandra considered his words for a moment. She then leaned forward whispering into his ear. "C'Tirr loves replicated Betazoid meat or catnip tea." She offers in way of being helpful. She took the opportunity to indulge in the scent of him, to enjoy the soft brush of her lips against his ear.

Thomas smiled at the feeling of her breath and lips brushing his ear. He turned his head to capture her lips in his as he surprised her with a kiss. "I'll have to see if I can get him some then." He whispered against her lips with a grin. His hands slid around her waist as he pulled her as close as he could. "And what would be a good gift for a special lady that has everything she could want? Flowers? candy? Jewelry?" He asked, a twinkle in his eyes as he stared into hers.

"How about...a husband." Cassandra said trying not to look as nervous as she felt in the moment. "I... I don't have one of those yet." She smiled shyly.

Thomas let out a chuckle. "That depends on if I can find you one of those." He said with a sly wink. "I heard they are hard to come by so I'll have to see if I know any Ferengi that might have one." He kissed the top of her head as he held her close to him.

Cassandra tried to mask her disappointment. His rejection stung. She reminded herself that they hadn't been together all that long. Only a year now. It had been unfair for her to spring such a thing on him. It still hurt though. Like all pain Cassandra shoved it down deep inside. "It was just a joke. I don't really want anything really." She said doing her best to save face.

Thomas flushed. "I'm sorry, I was just trying to play with you. To be honest I have been thinking about it for a while myself." He took a deep breath and shifted her in his lap so he could look her in the eyes, Those Dark blue eyes that looked like the deepest, clearest waters he had ever seen. He could see the pain that his joke had caused and felt horrible about it, wishing he could take it back. "Cass, I love you as much as a man can love a woman and I want us to always be together. I would love to be the husband you want and deserve. Be the father that Martha is needing right now. I just need to be a bit higher rank so that people don't think that I'm using you to advance nor that you are being picking favorites." He cupped her face and smiled. "What would Martha think if I became her daddy? That little girl has melted my heart and made it hers just as much as you have captured mine in the same way."

"I don't care what people think." Cassandra said. Her voice felt small. She knew he was right. It just didn't feel fair though. But she wasn't going to push him on it. She'd respect his choice. "I could step down from my position, take a hit in rank." She offered there was no joking in her tone now.

Thomas shook his head. "I don't want you to sabotage your own career for me though I know for a fact you would. I'm trying to do better in my career to try and catch up to you." He reached over to the bag he had setting next to him; it contained simple, easy to carry snacks and a small box. "I have been thinking about this for a while now, but I have decided to go ahead and do it." He rummaged down to the bottom and pulled a small package wrapped in paper with a red ribbon tied around it. It was about three inches, by three inches and one and a half inches tall. He handed it to her with a shy grin, one of the rare types he ever showed as his face went a bit red in the cheeks.

She looked at the box, then at him. He was trying so hard. She didn't want jewelry though, or pretty bobbles. She wanted security, stability. She took the box he offered and opened it trying to shove down the empty feeling that had opened up inside her stomach. It could take years for him to catch up to her. In that time alot could happen. So be it. She'd stop hoping for anything more.

Inside the box rested a simple golden ring. "As I said, I have been thinking on this for a while now and I want you to have this. It's a promise ring to let you know that I promise to be your husband in the future." He took the ring from the box and then took her left hand in his. He slipped it onto her ring finger. "I love you with all my heart and I want you, Martha and C'tirr to be my family."

A promise ring. "If you love me so damn much why is rank such a big deal to you?" She felt mad. It made no sense to her. She pushed away from him and got to her feet. "Why all the excuses? What's the real reason? Does what those small-minded bastard's think really mean more to you than being with me?" She pulled the ring off tossing it back to him. "Keep your damn promise and reputation then. I wouldn't want people to think less of you for being with me!" She shouted before turning and running off towards the holodeck exit point.

Thomas stood up quickly and ran after her. "WAIT!" He called after her. "DON'T LEAVE! WE CAN TALK ABOUT THIS PLEASE!"

Cassandra stopped short of the door. She spun with that cat like grace she'd been raised with. Her face was red, her eyes held fire. Her voice roared as she said, "TALK? TALK! YOU WANT TO TALK?. OKAY THEN!" The roar dropped to a angry stinging hiss her Capitan accent leaking through in her rage. "Let talk about how you can date me! Sleep with me! Play house with me! And not give a dithers damn what anyone else thinks! But the moment I ask you for a commitment you all of a suddenly think being with me will make you look bad! Are you using me? Is that really whats going on here? Something you picked up perchance from that Blake girl maybe?" She didn't care if she hurt him. He had thrown the first proverbial punch. "If you don't want to marry me fine! Just don't give me bullshit excuses for it. Just tell me straight up that it's not what you want and stop jerking me around. Because if you actually cared about your god damn reputation then you wouldn't be sleeping with me in the first place!" The hurt was obvious. Even as she said it she felt stupid. That had to be it. It was so obvious. "You are just using me." With that she turned and left not caring anymore about what he had to say. She'd been blind stupidity blind.

Thomas just stood there staring at the now closed door, his mouth working like a fish out of water. Hell, he felt like a fish out of water at that moment. He stood there a few minutes, his mind racing but completely blank at the same time.

Thomas slowly turned around and slowly walked back to the bag he had brought. "Computer, end program." He said quietly, the forest disappeared and was replaced with the grid marked room. His bag sat at his feet, the box next to it and the ring laying a couple of feet away. He stared at the ring a moment before he walked over and picked it up. With blurred vision he fumbled with the box and replaced the ring inside. He sat down next to the bag as he continued to stare at the box.

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